Of disappearing and reemerging

I am plagued by peculiar thoughts this evening my fellows. I feel lost among a sea of decay and despair. Now I am not naive this is likely highly to do with the fact I have clinical depression. However today it seems odd. I feel that there is currently much ado about nothing. (No that's not a nihilism reference) This may be a trait unique to myself but I find myself oddly detached from concerns I "Should" be facing. In particular those of my upcoming exams. Now don't mistake me dear readers i am revising and so on. It's just many around me are incredibly worried about them. Yet personally i feel ... well nothing. Again those few who are closet to me will know this isn't an odd thing. Indeed it's my general mood to be numb inside. However this feels different, I am currently beleaguered by the desire to disappear. This is not a desire i have ever felt before, granted I have wished to no longer exist (worry not friends I very very rarely feel this way anymore) yet never to merely fade away. Primarily I feel that i would like to just escape my current life details for a short period and not have to deal with the constant bullshit which appears to be the main focus of my current existence. I am finding this hard to conceptualise purely as it's such a new feeling, so my deepest apologies if the level of lucidity common around these parts is lessened today.  However returning to the point, I feel that I am growing further disconnected to the people closest to me, this isn't a good feeling because it reminds me a great deal of my past. Which although I am thankful it shaped me into the being I am today (someone whom many claim is a pleasant individual [I'm still uncertain though]) It's not something that i wish to repeat. Now my readers I must make a request of you. It is not an arduous task but one which I feel you are best suited at. Please every so often remind me that the mundane world is around and that my head needs to be somewhat grounded in it. Now I know that it is up for debate whether or not the world as we know it exists. However on this i feel i must be reminded to sometimes stop with the Socratic/Cartesian methodology and attempt to allow myself to reemerge into society.