Size

Here is a question: How big can can you comprehend? I ask this as I find my mind currently focusing on Cosmology in a great deal at the moment. I don't really know why but I am it's odd. This may have been because I am currently listening to this wonderful piece of music a great deal. It raises many questions to me.


Now these are questions which generally have been asked to infinity previously but none the less it's something I really want to explore. - I mean that in both a literal and metaphorical sense.- But none the less I know such a thing is unlikely to occur in my lifetime much to my deepest regret. However none the less it's still there in my mind. I consider that there is much flexibility in me yet I cannot even begin to consider the size of our solar system let alone that of our galaxy. Which in turn makes it impossible to grasp the size of the universe. However intellectually I know the figures:  a galaxy of 300 billion suns. A universe of 300 billion galaxies. This utterly terrifies me. I feel so infinitesimally small when I come even close to grasping the sheer volume of mass which must be in this universe. It is the main factor which sways me in my assertion that their must be other forms of life in the universe.


Consider for example that yes it is unlikely that another life supporting planet exists. However one also must attempt to consider just how vast space is. Now I personally do believe that there is life. Yet I also am quite adamant that as species it is unlikely we will ever meet. Despite my natural propensity to not enjoying being proven wrong in an assertion. I truly would enjoy it this time. Consider friends that within our lifetimes lies the possibilty of humankind once again setting foot on celestial bodies other than the mother planet. Indeed currently there is talk of attempting to begin a terraforming process upon Mars. Which is a prospect which excites me more than I can describe. It makes the world of Science fiction feel infinitesimal closer. Which being as I am a great nerd is the reason I am excited. 


What I am saying though dear readers. Is that if you haven't considered the size of the Universe perhaps you should try. After all science is doing it's best to make it closer and smaller. I can't wait to see what this future holds. To quote a favourite of mine. Live Long and Prosper friends.






P.S. here is another song about the universe

Reflections.

Today was something of a reflective day. Well not today rather this past hour or so. I found myself contemplating certain aspects of the future which I am normally able to keep out of my mind. Those of you who read this blog likely know what these aspects are. If not well then I have likely not been speaking to you while in a morose state of mind. However much I wish to deny it though, those aspects are creeping into my mind more often now than they have in the past. Indeed this process of Black thoughts is progressing with somewhat worrying speed. So much so that I fear for my mental well being. It's somewhat vexing that I am now almost completely absorbed with some ideas which I held not 16 months ago. These thoughts are ones which are generally regarded (by myself) as repulsive, yet they are becoming increasingly attractive.

This frankly terrifies me I am not ashamed to say that I increasingly feel that should seek some form of help for this. However -here we come to the crux of my irritation- I have left all of previous support networks behind seeking an education in a city on the opposite cost of our island home. Thus I now find myself lost in a sea of despair and isolation. In my lighter moods it is a source of almost limitless amusement (who doesn't like to laugh at their own misfortune?) After all while I built that network there was never a need to use it. Now that it is broken I am in honestly quite dire need of ways in which to escape my own feelings.

Thus I am pondering where I should go from here. I am still currently able to resist the urges which I am getting. However if memory serves correctly these things have a tendency to grow exponentially and thus one ends up being unable to resist. No matter how powerful their Will (sorry Hal) Thus as I say comes in the quandary currently I am able to utilise a combination of this here Blog as a receptacle for my catharsis. However I feel that it is likely that this will eventually not be able to contain the torrent of emotions which I feel. That is I doubt despite my quite highly polished vocabulary I will not be able to satisfactorily express that which runs through my mind. I therefore feel it is likely I should look into my university's counselling service. However I fear that it may have a price tag attached which worries me.

However I know realistically that you care not for any of what I am saying. Either you know it all ready or you don't actually know enough to fully understand my vagaries. If either of these cases describes you. I apologise wholeheartedly. I don't mean to bore you (fat chance of that if you read this you will all ready be bored) However if you know enough of what is going on to know what I mean and you haven't heard this particular aspect of my thoughts then please give me your perspective. I am really stretching my somewhat limited intellect to it's limits attempting to sort these emotions of mine out.

I am sorry for the whine fest that this post entailed. It was really being used as a form of Catharsis. I shall endeavour to think of something interesting to comment on some time later in the week for you to peruse over.