Some thoughts

It occurred to me today, I depart within two weeks. Indeed this time in a fortnight I shall be in an airplane, as you all most likely know I am heading to the United States of America this summer in order to be a lifeguard in a summer camp. However some of you might not know that although I am incredibly happy and fortunate to be able to go. I still feel some regret, after all as I have commented in the past you all have only entered my life recently, I therefore am somewhat disheartened to have to so abruptly leave your company pretty much forever. 

Therefore I shall go so far as to say my emotions are bittersweet. (my gosh I didn't think I would ever use that term) None the less once again I shall say, despite it now being painful to leave, I wouldn't trade that pain for the loss of you all. You all are the fuel for my optimism which i stuff into the face of that overriding nihilism. (Oh wow look we have a title) Thus you may not consider me while you follow the path of your life this summer. Please know I am going to be thinking of you. 

I actually have been thinking about nihilism recently. I have realised me and nihilism have an odd relationship, somewhat of a paradox some would say. As nihilism excites me in ways which I don't feel in any other means. That is nihilism is one of the few things I am truly passionate about. However when I take it to it's logical conclusions, it just makes me feel incredibly low. Which i suppose makes sense heck nihilism is a worrying concept, especially some of the ways in which one might act in a morally nihilistic world. In essecence it's why I relie so heavily on you all. You who disagree with me when I become obsessed with the concept of an oblibvion as an after life. You who remind me that there is some light left in the world. 

So dear friends my thanks. 

Please don't stop being the optimism to my nihlism.